I’ve been surprised at how many messages I’ve received regarding the SQL RAP I hastily wrote last night, like:
loriedwards: @sqlfool Much love for your sql rap. Does this make you an MC DBA?
AndyLeonard: Green tea all over my laptop monitor – this is hilarious @sqlfool !
Jimmy May: OMG!!! I am howling!!! All y’all have soitenly gotten me beat. So to speak…
If you haven’t read Ward’s excellent response to my poor excuse for a rap, you can find it on his blog. Ward beat me soundly (I definitely “hit a nuke with rubber bands!”), but in my defense, I did not know he was an accomplished singer and song writer! The most musical talent I have is beating Guitar Hero on the Hard difficulty mode. Hey, it’s impressive if you’re me.
But what I’ve been surprised to find, aside from Ward’s musical genius, is how many *other* DBA’s are inclined to spin a little rhyme:
SQLChicken: @sqlfool you know w/ who u be messin?Take your broke ass rhymes and learn this lesson.I’ll purge u like bad data,so step off and see u lata!
mike_walsh: @sqlfool – @sqltwit thinks he’s a master of prose but the emperors got no clothes. Webcam? What a sham… #sqlrapsaga
jeffrush: @sqlfool @sqltwit @andyleonard you are all crazy like an orange / rhyming isn’t hard at… DOH!
Clearly, we need to give these folks an avenue to vent their repressed rhythms; the last thing we need is more maniacal DBA’s running around. So here’s my chance to save the world here’s your chance to show off your rap skillz. I am officially throwing down the proverbial gauntlet to the ENTIRE WORLD the SQL Server and .NET community to submit your own SQL RAP.
Why should you participate? Well, for street cred, of course! Oh, you want something more? How about a shiny new iPod Touch?
Now that I have your attention, here’s the rules:
- Your rap has to be original, but may parody existing songs.
- Your rap has to relate to SQL Server in some form; the geekier, the better. Bonus points for working SQL Server 2008 features or SQL bloggers into the song.
- You only need to submit the lyrics to your song. Bonus points for video and/or audio accompaniments.
Meet your judges:
Brent Ozar – a SQL Server expert by trade and a smart-ass at heart, Brent will be judging your rap on its overall entertainment value.
Ward Pond – a SQL Server guru by day, songwriter by night, Ward will be judging your rap’s overall “musical flow”… whatever that means.
Realistically, we may not get that many submissions, so this may be the best odds you ever have at winning something. Plus, I hear Brent is pretty easy to bribe.
Send your raps to me at michelle @ sqlfool dot com. The deadline for submissions is 8pm CST on Monday, 18 May 2009. I’ll post the entries and the winners around a week after that, depending on how busy I am.
So what are you waiting for? Go throw on some Snoop and/or a Kimberly Tripp webcast and get rappin’!